Friday, January 23, 2009

The Mourning and the Dancing

It's funny to grieve the death of an organ that most people don't even know what it's function is, much less where it is in their body. But that's what I'm doing. My daughter's pancreas is dying, attacked by her own body. It's treason of the highest degree, and there isn't a thing I can do to stop it.

Norman Cousins, a famous journalist said, "Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live. " And while he meant something totally different, I can't help feeling that about Elise's turncoat of a pancreas. The death of her pancreas has totally and forever changed her life.

And while I mourn this death, I cannot help but rejoice that Elise is still "fearfully and wonderfully made", and through the miracles of science, my daughter will grow up and live the life she was meant to.

And so each day I wake up with a prayer in my heart. I pray for the inventors of new technologies that will make dealing with this disease easier. I pray for all the families whose lives are touched by diabetes; that their hearts will be filled with hope and joy, despite their hardships. I pray for the ones living with diabetes, for it is they who have the toughest battle of all.

But above all, what my heart longs for, my soul aches for, and every part of me screams out for, is a cure. I pray that one will be found and that I will live to see it. Wouldn't it be amazing for a cure to be found so soon, that Elise could grow up and not even remember having diabetes?

That is my prayer, would you join me and make it yours too?


  1. I do and will every day! And now for the past month or so (?) since I found you, I include Elise by name. Elise, my brother and sister, Logan (the little boy whose team I was on for the walk last year) and Andrea and Hope (two former students of mine diagnosed when I had them as 6th and 7th graders--who I will add now are awesome & healthy 22 and 23 year old women! one of whom is getting a nursing degree focusing on diabetic education)
    You got me choked up on this one. Just thinking about how wonderful it could be if the cure is found SOON and she doesn't remember life with JD. And for my siblings who have lived so long with JD to have a regular life for once. I can't think of much more that I could want.

    Hang in there--


  2. Thanks Maria, it means a lot to know that people are praying with me. I'll be praying for those in your life as well.

  3. I will pray too, for healing, for peace, endurance, strength and protection.

    That would be wonderful if she didn't have to grow up with it.


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