Monday, August 10, 2015

What lies beneath

It was reward for a season well-played.  Elise's soccer coach promised that if the girls won all three of their playoff games that day, next week he would treat them to ice cream after the game. So win they did.

Cue 7 year old girls squealing.

Cue inward groans from one mom.

Don't get me wrong... I'd be crazy to be against ice cream.  It's just...

The game was around dinner  time... we'd have to do ice cream first, then dinner.

Trying to make sure her BG stays pretty good during the game is hard enough, now I have to make sure she's at a decent enough number to have a treat after the game?

Let's not forget how crazy her BG can run after games.  Adding ice cream just doubles the fun!

Of course, no matter what, Elise was going to be included.  Even if her BG was 400, she would get her ice cream.  The hard part is that nobody (but you guys) gets what a crazy, mind-crushing, hold-your-breath-and-hope-the-stars-align freaking tightrope we as parents walk in that situation.

Two hours before game: BG is 220.  You want to correct, but not too much so she isn't low at game time.

Check her BG before game: 170.  Hold your breath as you hope the exercise plus IOB doesn't crash her.  

Watch during the game as the dex meanders a line between 190 and 210.  You want it to go lower.  Hope it doesn't go higher.

See her check her pod on her leg after she makes a save in goal and kicks the ball away. Make a mental note to ask what that was about later.

Game is over. Finger poke shows 203.  Bolus for 20g and head to the ice cream shop with the team.

All these decisions we must make, the internal dialogue... nobody gets it (again, present company excluded). It's exhausting.

So off we went to the ice cream shop.  Elise's cone was at least double what I had bolused for.  So I bolused some more.  One of the moms watching commented about the PDM, "Cool!  It's like a remote!"

After the ice cream was consumed, we left to find dinner.  We stopped at a restaurant, but due to behavioral issues, we decided to leave.  

But honestly, it was the 360 double arrows up that was the real reason. Elise's BG was skyrocketing and we didn't know why.  We found out soon enough.

Remember Elise checking her pod during the game?  Something had hit her leg and jostled the pod, resulting in the cannula coming out.  By the time we got home, almost three hours had elapsed, Elise had eaten about 50g of carbs and received no insulin.

What's the point of this post?  It's what people see vs. what they don't see.  They see me check Elise, give insulin, give carbs and we all live happily ever after. Simple... like using a remote.

What they didn't see was the 509 on the meter.  The ketones. The stomach pain.  The crying. The shot. The pod change. The bacon and yellow pepper she ate for dinner at 9:30 because her BG was still so high. The worried discussion on just how much insulin to give her. After all, it was bedtime.

It. Is. Exhausting.

Why do I wish others could see what lies beneath?  I don't know.  I don't.  I just wish they could get what freaking rock stars our children are.


  1. I want to give you a hug :) you and other d parents are so awesome <3 it is so difficult and you are so amazing for ensuring that she is safe but also so that she doesn't have to miss out :) keep rocking it

  2. Totally get it! The mental exhaustion makes you physically exhausted. We just went for a check up at the regular doctors and I mentioned b/s were hard to get down. Turns out she was positive for strep but had no symptoms! This is the second time that has happened. I kept changing her site thinking it wasn't working when it was strep the whole time :-/ Diabetes can be sooo frustrating!!
    Thanks for letting me vent!!

  3. and what rock stars all of us d parents are...bravo to you for holding it together, taking care of your beautiful rockstar daughter and making sure the being a kid came first. I hear you on the whole soccer game stuff, Isaac did a slide during a baseball game and winced a bit a parent commented, "he probably hurt his butt on that slide" I had a feeling it was more, and sure enough his site had gotten ripped out. Ouch indeed! (he uses steel cannulas!) But he kept playing and eventually BG got back in a healthy range and all ended up okay, it usually does, thanks to the amazing teamwork of d families :) ((HUGS))

  4. We have only been diagnosed for one week and I totally understand! It's the behind the scenes constant stress and decision making that we do. You are an amazing Mom! Your daughter is definitely a ROCK STAR, but so are you :) HUGS!!!!!

  5. :((((((
    I always say that I don't wish it on my worst enemy, but I do wish it for people for just one day to get a small understanding. And, of course, one day is nothing.
    I'm sorry. :(


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