I've got the diabetes blues and I don't know why.
It's not like anything out of the ordinary has been happening... Elise's numbers have been okay, although not great. But we haven't had any crazy, unexplained highs, or difficult lows (we did have to leave play time at open gym today because her BG would not go up, even after the 20g, and then 18g I stuffed into her).
I just feel beaten up. I feel sad every time I test her BG. I want to cry with every shot she gets. Counting carbs depresses me, and I've shut off all thoughts about what her future holds.
Maybe I'm just overly tired. Maybe it's the pregnancy. It could be due to the fact that we heard back about our insurance and the CGM, and the news wasn't great (covered, but the cost may be prohibitive).
Maybe it's the fact that I feel so poured out, yet I feel like I have nothing to renew my spirit.
It happens to all of us from time to time. It will pass and I will feel better. I know this.
I just need it to be sooner rather than later.
20 hours ago