Wednesday, December 2, 2009

I can't get away from it even when I sleep

Since we are leaving for our trip tomorrow, everything about me is a nervous, I-think-I'm-getting-an-ulcer mess. My anxiety comes out in various forms... eating too many M&Ms (and not even the mini ones... which I can't find anywhere), knots in my shoulders, and one GIGANTIC knot in my stomach.

But the worst has to be my dreams. Whenever I get stressed about something, it ALWAYS manifests itself while I sleep.

For example, this morning I had a dream that I was in a parking lot, and some guy was trying to rob me. He wanted to take the diaper bag that I carry with me at all times, but I started pleading with him that my daughter has diabetes and her insulin and all her supplies were in there. He could have my wallet, just leave me the bag. I don't remember all the details, but I do know at one point I was lining him up for a good ol' groin-kneeing.

It's good to see that my propensity for groin-related violence carries over to my slumber.

I am well aware that instead of typing all this out, I should really be getting ready for our trip, but then I would miss out on the chance of becoming one big ball of crazy a little later on tonight when it's one o'clock in the morning and I'm still not packed because I just realized I haven't done the laundry and nobody has any clean underwear.

Did I mention our flight leaves at 8:40 am?

Why so worried Joanne?

(and yes, I do realize I have been referring to myself in the third person a lot lately)

I am worried about the four hour flight out there. Will it leave on time? Will there be any delays? Elise will be needing to eat her lunch about 30 minutes before we land; will she be able to finish in time? How will Elise do on the flight?

We've been having HUGE issues with her shots lately, of the wailing and gnashing of teeth variety. How will she be when we have to give her the shot in public? Will it cause a scene? Will I have to punch someone out for saying the wrong thing at the wrong time? Will I be deported if I do?

And the two hour time difference... Oh. My. Gosh. Our endo gave us tips on how to handle it, but I'm afraid we're going to screw up and forget to give her a snack at the proper time before we can convert to west coast time, and her BG will crash.

It will be okay, and even if it isn't, we'll handle it. Between Fred and I, I know we can handle anything. It's just my brain likes to play a game; "Let's Think of Every Single Thing that can go Wrong and get Stressed out About It".

Okay, now that I've gotten THAT out of my system, time to go pack some stuff. And maybe do some laundry, too.


  1. I think too much too :) Don't you feel a LITTLE better now that you shared your stresses with us? Thats why we are here! AND, it will all be ok.

  2. Oh yes, Kelly... so much better. I even managed to loosen the knot in my stomach!

  3. Oh Joanne....I KNOW the feeling! Stress comes out in my dreams, too...I've had dreams (usually before a big trip) that I've forgotten all of Jada's supplies. HORRIBLE! My latest "bad" dream.....that it was X-mas eve and we had not a thing for our kids!!! I woke up in a panic!
    Okay...deep CAN do it!!!
    And while your at some more M&M's for me.... :)

  4. Joanne, You'll all do great!! I was very worried about my handicapped brother Erik flying (alone!) to Denver and back last week....everything went great!! The Lord watched over him and protected. And He'll do that for you too....Have a wonderful time!

  5. Jo - Jo - Jo,

    I have no doubt in my mind that you, Fred and Elise will do fine tomorrow. Now get off the computer and go wash your underwear - - - it is a requirement for travel.

    Have a great trip. I will be here missing you desperately!

  6. I pack better at the last minute anyway. You are doing the right thing...procrastination is a big motivator.

    Breath. Pack. Sleep. Travel. Then have a blast. A few shot tantrums isn't going to ruin anything!

    I. AM. GIDDY.

  7. PS. This is Meri...using my sister in laws computer and as usual, forgetting to change to my google account.

  8. Oh Joanne all of us get that way . boy you just reminded me I have got laundry to do and smile it all will be alright . Many hugs and smiles on your trip and hope you get to meet Meri and have lots of fun while you are there .

  9. I think it was Eisenhower who said, "I find plans useless,but the process of planning invaluable."

    I can totally relate to making sure everything is in order. Diabetes does tend to bring out the obsessive in us sometimes, doesn't it?

  10. I'm sure everything will be fine! If you're REALLY worried you could always skip the nph for the flight and start it again in the new time zone at bedtime like you normally do…solves the time difference problem and the possibility of lunch not being on time.

  11. I hate waking up to a bad dream about diabetes... my whole day is edgy!

    I am glad posting helped you get rid of the knot in your stomach, and hopefully you have been able to get some rest. Good luck on your flight..

  12. Joanne first I do know a certain candy store that has mini m&ms (my store) and if you do need to punch someone because they make a rude comment or even give you a look just know that Canada will take you back!!

    Have a safe and enjoyable trip!!


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